“Son of a bitch Bubbles! What the hell was that?! I nearly crapped my drawers!”
“Want a drink friend? I’m going to make Zombies!”
“What are you talking about? It’s 9 o’clock in the morning.”
“It’s never too early to try something new my son! Or really old as the case may be.”
“No, I think I’m… Jesus! Why aren’t you wearing any pants?!”
“It’s a beautiful day! What better chance to give the mistah a little fresh air!”
“That… That is extremely inappropriate.”
“Calm down friend, no need to be so prudish.”
“I’m going back to bed…”
We hang on to the past so tightly. Fond memories and stories. Pictures and special mementos. We also hold on to things that offer us no benefit. Perceptions and expectations. Fears and regrets. The person you are today was built upon all of your experiences, good and bad, but you don’t need to let those things define you.
I was asked a question today. If I could tell my 16 year old self anything, what would it be? My response was, no matter how bad things look right now, everything is going to be all right. Just keep walking.
It’s ok. You’re safe. Don’t worry.
For better or worse, I’ve always been a product of my environment. I absorb the attitude and energy of what is around me, and that is what I present to the world. It’s not intentional. In fact, until recently I didn’t give it much thought. The problem is that I’m beginning to believe this is no way to live! When do I get to be me?
Today, things change. From now on, when I speak, I will use my own words. When I act, it will be for my own reasons. When I leave, I will not look back.
Our path isn’t always clear. It may have once seemed that way, but what used to be a wide and well defined trail can turn thin and overgrown. One day you’re busy forging ahead, just like usual, and then you look up and you’re lost. Don’t panic, it happens.
Try something for me. From now on, speak only the truth. Do not be concerned if it doesn’t comply with what your society, church, or mother says. Be true to yourself. Because when you leave falsehoods behind your situation will begin to change. Your true path will become clear again.
Worldwide prune reserves depleted, irregularity abounds.
“Hey, wake up.”
“Wake up, we have to go.”
“We’re meeting my mother for dinner, remember?”
“We’re going to be late, let’s go.”
“Jesus, give me a minute would ya?”
“Okay cranky pants. Are you feeling alright? That was your second nap today.”
“I think so. Not sure.”
“Not sure? What does that mean?”
“It means I’m not sure. What do you want me to say?”
“I don’t know. Maybe you need to figure it out though.”
“Yeah, well, there’s a lot to figure out I guess.”
“Well then, what are you waiting for?”
I used to hear a saying, “the shadow knows.”
So I wonder; what does my shadow know?
It follows me everywhere, slinking around corners, and over bumps in the road.
Sometimes it’s in front of me.
Is it trying to warn me of pending danger?
Sometimes it’s behind me.
It makes me nervous when it follows me like that.
Does it know anything? Does it know everything?
I can’t stop thinking about it.
Until I figure it out though, I’m going to sit here, in the dark, where I know my shadow can’t find me.
At least, I hope…
The bath water is warm. All of the day’s tensions are leaving my body. I sink further below the surface. Something is calling to me. I follow the path of light, something previously glimpsed only in dreams. The sense of joy and freedom is amazing. I know that this is where I need to be.
From beyond I hear a voice, “No, not yet.”
“But, I’m ready,” I respond.
“There is still more for you to learn, so much to experience.”
I blink my eyes, and I’m home. The water has gone cold around me. So has my spirit.
Something like the Terro things, but about twenty times the size, drops out of the sky over us. Its massive beak, which surely could have swallowed both of us whole, opens wide as it skims toward the water. One of the Terro’s is caught off guard and with one sickening snap it’s done for.
The monster banks high and to the left, it circles and drops to the patchy grass in front of us. It claps its jaws twice more, finishing off what I fear is just an appetizer. It stops for a second, and then turns its attention to us.
“Wow, a Quetzalcoatlus!”
“So, we should be running now, right?”
The kid’s moment of awe quickly passes, “Oh. Yeah. We should.”
The monster, I’m not even going to try and pronounce this one, lets out a deep, harsh croak and starts coming towards us. Its wings are folded and clawing at the ground as it gains speed. A four legged bird isn’t the weirdest thing I’ve seen lately, but it’s up there.
I’m scrambling to get moving while dragging the kid along behind me. The monster is gaining on us, I can hear that crazy beak clacking in anticipation, and then I feel the tip graze my arm.
“Holy sh…” There’s a flash and the familiar scent of ozone. I open my eyes and the prehistoric menagerie is gone.